Deal with your fears regarding intimacy and connecting physically with another person. Accept that you are afraid, and find out where it’s coming from. It can be helpful to realize that your fears are probably not related to your current partner or events, and to try to move past them. Talk to your partner and let them know that you are uncomfortable and why. Ask him or her to be patient. Showing physical affection can be easier as you get to know someone better and deal with the root causes of your discomfort with physical intimacy. Plus, improving communication may lead to a closer and more affectionate relationship. [3] X Expert Source Lena Dicken, Psy. DClinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 5 February 2021. Talk to a professional about it. They can help you deal with the negative emotions related to your fears and get over your hesitation to show physical affection. If you don’t want to talk to someone, you can write about it in a journal or express your feelings in other ways. Make showing physical affection a habit. Hold your partner’s hand, touch their shoulder or give them a hug as often as possible. Eventually, showing affection physically will come easier and more natural.
Some ways that you can show affection include: kissing, back rubs, massages, caressing, cuddling, holding, hugging and holding hands. There may be other methods specific to you or your relationship that can also relay feelings of love. Although it may take 21 days to form a habit, the time length depends upon the person. Continue referencing this list for several months to permanently change how much physical affection you show.
Verbal expressions of affection are the words you speak intended to validate your positive feelings of love and affection and make your partner feel loved. This can be unique to you, your partner and your relationship as long as what you say produces the intended emotions and reinforces your affection for each other. If you must use electronic modes of communication, sign off with a phrase like “Thinking of you” or “Miss you” instead of a something generic. [10] X Research source
Look for things that you admire, appreciate or that the other person is good at to compliment. This can be anything from the way they look, a feature of their face that you particularly enjoy (such as eyes or lips), a personality trait, accomplishments, the positive way they make you feel or a skillset that you admire. Be honest, and don’t let opportunities to compliment those you love pass you by. Tell your wife, “You have beautiful eyes” while looking at her or “You complete me”, if it’s true. Tell your husband, “You look handsome in that shirt” when he gets ready for work or “You’re a great cook” when he makes you breakfast. Tell your child, “You’re so smart” when you see a report card or “You’re good at sports” after practice.
Some common nicknames include: Angel, Cowboy, Doll, Babe, Dear, Honey, Love or Sweetheart or Sweetie.