Try saying “You seem down. What would help you feel better right now?” Listen when they tell you what they want. For example, if they say “I want to be alone,” then leave them alone for a while.
If it’s someone else’s turn, avoid trying to turn things back to you. You’d feel upset if someone did that to you, so don’t do that to your friend. Let things focus on them. You can take your turn once their turn is over. Try to have a list of interesting questions on hand that you can ask to get to know other people on a deeper level.
Of course, you can still bring up things about your life. Just wait a bit if it seems like a bad time.
Remember—being perfect isn’t relatable. We all make mistakes or mess up once in awhile. Handling yourself maturely makes you look more human and relatable, thus increasing your charisma.
It’s okay to be fidgety if that’s the way you are. Find a way to fidget quietly without distracting others. Redirect your fidgeting if someone says it’s bothering them.
Don’t forward chain mail, even if it’s warning about something scary or suggesting you could get paid. This type of stuff is always fake and it can annoy people. Avoid sending more than 2 messages in a row if someone isn’t responding. Give them time to answer you. It may be that they’re busy right now and will be able to get to you later.
Accidents happen. If you interrupt someone, say “I’m sorry. What were you saying?” Then listen closely.
When in doubt, focus on being interested, not interesting. People love it when you listen to them.
If you do need to correct someone, do it gently and try to help them save face.
Avoid telling people that their life experiences are wrong.
If someone isn’t interested, it usually doesn’t mean anything bad about you. It just means that this isn’t the right topic right now. Try asking about something that they’re interested in.
If you aren’t sure what would make them happy, try saying “we can talk about it or not talk about it if you’d like. "
